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24AJournalofContemporaryShamanismVOLUME7ISSUE1SPRING2014Iwasblessedtopilgrimagetoamoun-tainonthesouthernshoresofLakeTahoewithinthePaiutetraditionandintroducedbyaneldertothisdeitysmanifestationintheworldGratitude.IthoughtthatIknewandunderstoodthanksbutIrealizedaftermythreedaysandnightsoffastingandplacingsacredofferingsthatmypreviousknowingofthispowerfulemotionandwayofbeingintheworldhadbeensuperficial.Ittookamountainfallingonmetoexperiencegratitudeandwarmthandconnectionthatcomewithunrestrictedgiving.Thisdeitygavethegreatgiftofbeinggratitudeandhavinglivedthishasal-lowedmetoreturnagainandagaintomyplaceintheworld.PeterBrownOlympiaWashingtonIwaslocateduponawoodedridgeoverlookingafield.Astandofpinetreescreatedanicecircleofshadeandwindbreak.IcreatedasimplemedicinewheelandeachmorningandeveningprayedtoandconnectedwiththefourdirectionsGreatSpiritandMotherEarth.Thequietoftheplaceallowedmetomeditateforanextendedperiodoftimeanddeepenmyobservationskills.Ichosetofasttoaddtoanalteredstatewhileonsolo.Theconnectiontonatureengenderedbythesoloformeistheheartofashamanicpractice.Theconnectiontonaturetransferstotheabilitytoconnectwithmyself.ThesoloremindedmeIamalsopartofnatureandherrhythms.KarenDiTrapaniAlbuquerqueNMOnmythree-daysoloIhadtolearnasongfromSpiritthatIwouldthenbecalledupontosingintheceremonyclosingthesoloexperience.IdidntconsidermyselfasingerbutIalsounderstoodthatapartofshamanicpracticeissinging.OntheseconddayIlaydownonthegroundearlyinthemorningandwithgreatgratitudeforthistimealoneprayedtoSpiritforhelpinmytask.IcalledoneverygoddessIknewbynametosurroundmeandtheydid.AnditwasMaryMagdalenewhostoodatmyhead.Withnoeffortasonghonoringherpowerandhealingabil-ityandbeneficenceandsacredplaceasconsorttotheChristenergyfilledme.ForadayandahalfIsangthatmagnificentsonggiftandItookitbacktomycirclewiththecouragetosinginfrontof30people.PatLilesSanAnselmoCaliforniaThetransformationexperienceofmywildernesssolocamenotfromanydramaticrevelationbutbecauseIdidthehardtediousinnerworkofreviewingmylifestartingwithmyfirstmemoriesreleasinganyangerorfearandgivingmyselfacknowledgmentforthetriumphsandkindnesses.Thateffortwasemotion-allydrainingworkandittookmostofthetimeonsolo.Theresulthoweverleftmefeelingcleanerandlighter.Theexperi-enceleftmemoreintunewithmyselfandnatureandmuchmoreopentoSpirit.TraceyWhitleyAttorneyatLawLastsummerIbackpackedintheMarbleMountainstakingmypackrattleandintentions.Ihopedforsup-portwithmyintensefearofbears-ashadowonanotherwisebeautifulloveaffairwiththeoutdoors.Idneverseenabearwhilebackpackingbutthefearwasaliveandreal.Ileftanofferingaskedforsupportfromspiritofplaceandhikedin.WithinanhourIheardthensawablackbearcubgazingatmewhilerompingupahill.PureaweanddelightThefirstnightbythefireIrattledconnectedwiththespir-itofplaceandhadasurprisinglyrest-fulsleepinterwovenwithdreamvisitsfromwolfandothers.OverthenexttwonightsIworkedthroughlayersoffearandlimitingbeliefs.WhenIsetupcamponmyfinalnightunderatreewithfreshsapdrippingfromabearsclawIhadtolaugh.Bearhadbeenwithmethewholewaywithitsstrengthandpowerhelpingmecallonmyinnerresourcesandfindmywaytofreedominthewilderness.EleniLivitsanosSanFranciscoBayAreaIhavedonemanymanysoloswithwonderfulexperiences.Sittingqui-etlylisteningtonatureandgettingintomyheartalwaysmakesmefeelonewithnature.Thequietnessandbeingalonegivesmetimeforreflec-tionandtogetquestionsIhaveaboutmyselfanswered.ThereweretimesthatIstayedawakeallnighttocommunicatewiththenightskywhichwasverysatisfy-ing.Lyingontheearthlookingupatthestarsandseeingmeteoriteswasaverypowerfulexperience.IalwaysfeltsafeevenwhentheelkcamerompingbymyspotandwhenIcouldhearthebears.Therewereinsectstoseeandmanybirdstowatchandtalktoespeciallythehummingbird.IfeltsoprivilegedthatIwroteasongaboutallthecritters.FloraMcCormackSittinginsidemystonecircleattheedgeoftheOzarkforestIwatchtheskymovingfurtherawayasthestarsrecede.Lurkingshadowsscurryfromthehalf-lightastheglowofpredawnslipsin.ThedawnfeelssoaliveIfeelsoaliveEverythingthatoccurswithinmysacredcircleofstonesispartofmyvisionquest...mythoughtsdreamsandfearsinthenight.Aninsectsbuzzingasnakesmeanderingthevoiceofabirdshapesinthecloudsthewindinthetrees....allareanswerstomyprayersandmessagesfromspirit.NatureshowsmetheinnerworkingsofmysoulandwhereIfitintheworld.Timealonesittingandbeingmakesmereachdeepinside.Myyearlyquestsgivemevaluableinsights.ItisaprocessItrustdeeply.IgototheWildtorememberwhoIam.PatTuholskeGrubvilleMissouriMembersShareTheirSoloExperiences